argh. i would love to be able to get through to that man. i loved him once. i would so easily be able to love him again if he were to try... i know there's something of value within him. no matter, too much has been said and done, and it's becoming less and less important that he know what is going on with me day after day. it's becoming more and more important to me to rediscover myself and my strength.
i am reading 'All the Pretty Horses'. pretty phenomenal. this struck me like a brick:
Long before morning I knew that what I was seeking to discover was a thing I'd always known. That all courage was a form of constancy. That it was always himself that the coward abandoned first. After this all other betrayals came easily.
btw: i forgot how good pink floyd is...
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